Chapter 4 – Going through the motions: Part 1

Second Chances by Emily

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Synopsis: The first half of Tony's first day of school as Christina


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I eventually found my English homework. I skimmed it to see what Christina wrote before I handed it in. It went completely over my head. Either she's a better student than me, or that is literally the same BS I wrote 20 years ago.

I was able to follow along with the rest of the class and it triggered long forgotten memories. I was called on once. I made up something about fake culture and Holden Caufield's pessimism. It wasn't hard honestly. After all, I came from a year that society had regressed into hiding behind social media and presenting a different version of their life in all of their pictures. Everyone was a "phony" on Instagram. My own Instagram feed was full of my ex-wife's friends who staged their "candids." I bet the teacher didn't even appreciate my unique point of view on the subject.

The rest of the morning actually flew by without any major incidents. I avoided getting called on the rest of English class or in Pre-calc. Once I got into a groove, it was easy to forget I was in a girl's body, and just went with the flow.

In AP Computer Science, we were given computer time to complete this week's programming assignment. I was able to easily complete that by the end of class. My only disappointment was it took me too long because all of the tools I use at work on a daily basis didn't exist yet.  

My teacher, Mr. Perry was quite impressed since that was supposed to be a week-long project. "That is impressive." he said. "May I?" he motioned at the keyboard.

"Sure." I got up as he sat down at the computer and started scrolling through the program.

"You used recursion?" he sounded surprised. "Impressive. We won't cover that until later in the year. Excellent work Christina."

I mentally patted myself on the back. It's nice to be given praise and appreciated.

Next period was Lunch. I took this opportunity to find my locker. I knew it was in the Marching Band member's wing near the Band room and cafeteria.

I made a detour and walked into the cafeteria so I could go through my bag. I stood at an empty table and put my bag on it.  I went through my stuff to see if I could find my locker number. Hidden at the back of my binder was a postcard with the hand written locker number and combination. "Thank God I don't throw stuff away" I told myself.

Back into the hallway, I found my locker, and entered the combination on the turn dial. I hate these things. Click. "Sweet. First try."  Maybe things are looking up.

Inside my locker was my gym bag and some books for later in the day. The inside of the locker had a few pictures taped to it.

A picture of Christina and Cindy at a football game. Christina was dressed in the marching band uniform and Cindy was dressed in her cheerleading uniform. It was likely taken recently since Cindy's a freshman this year and school typically starts for us in early September.

There was also a prom picture of Christina at what looks like the Junior Prom. I didn't recognize the boy standing next to her. I went to the Junior prom with a fellow marching band member. She had hinted heavily that it was a platonic date so she could hang out with other friends who were coupled so she didn't have to go by herself. I could only assume Christina had the same arrangement with this dude in the picture.

And of course was a picture of Captain Picard. I'm sure most girls have heartthrobs taped to their locker. I have the ultimate male role model. I approve of Christina's choice here.

There was also a flyer tapped near the pictures. "Chrissy Demarco for Class President". I chuckled. I remember running for that late junior year. It was one of the few times I tried to do something like that. I lost to someone much more popular, and decided to retire from class politics.

Ron approached me, "BK or Micky D's?"

Lunch. That's right. This was our routine. Ug. The thought of fast food didn't sit right with me. I hadn't eaten at either of those restaurants in a long time. As an adult my palette changed to other cuisines. I didn't want to eat at any of those places. I had an idea.

"You know what I haven't had in awhile." I said. "A decent New Jersey pizza. I've been living off that Papa John's poor imitation for the past few weeks." Whoops. I said that last sentence out loud.

"What do you mean? We had pizza yesterday." Ron said. "But we can do it again if you really want. It's your birthday."

"Great! Thank you" I said, not elaborating on my mistake. I took the wallet out of the backpack and deposited the bag in my locker. I slipped my locker combination in my jeans pocket, and shut the locker door.

We walked out of the school and to Ron's truck. We drove to "Joe's Pizzeria" which was really only a few blocks away from school. Before we got our licences we used to just walk. 

As we walked in- oh the nostalgia. Now that's what I'm talking about. The smell of halfway decent pizza sauce. The red and white checkered tablecloths.  A guy tossing pizza dough over his head yelling Italian American obscenities to the back of the kitchen. 

I ordered 2 slices and a Diet Pepsi. It was delightful and hit the spot. The conversation between Ron and I was casual. We talked about our mornings, our high school football team, the music we were supposed to memorize for our field show. I'm glad this aspect of my relationship with Ron hadn't changed. It really put me at ease and kept me grounded in the moment as if the past 20 years hadn’t happened.

There were times however that our eyes would meet and he would instantly look away. Maybe my Mom was right about him having a crush. He can't have a crush on me. He dated a number of girls senior year. He's married now. I was a groomsman at his wedding.  Him having a crush on me could seriously alter the timeline.

After our meals, we drove back to school right as the lunch period ended. I walked back to my locker - and was able to recall the combination without checking my "cheat sheet". I pulled out the gym bag and headed to the gym.

As I got to the gym I caught myself almost entering the boys' locker room as a boy was walking out the door.  He gave me an awkward glance and kept walking.  I cursed to myself. The girls locker room was on the other side of the gym. I took a deep breath. "Here goes another first." I mumbled under my breath as I pushed through the girls' locker room door.

Despite outwardly being a girl, I still felt like a guy. Walking into a girls locker room felt forbidden. I kept my head down and found an empty aisle of lockers benches.

I put my bag down and opened it to see what I was working with. Another marching band shirt similar to the one I woke up with. Maroon track shorts. A blue sports bra. A padlock with a key sticking out of it.

I took off the shirt first.  I held the sports bra and looked down at the bra I was currently wearing.  OK.  I can do this.  I tried to be suave and un-clip my own bra with one hand. It took me a few attempts but I got it. I looked around before I removed it from my chest. After all, even I haven’t seen my own breasts yet.  Not gonna let a stranger see me topless.  Nobody was around so I pulled it off and quickly put the sports bra on. I had almost gotten used to the boobs bouncing around in my bra all morning. The sports bra's compression actually made me feel a little more normal. I quickly put on my gym shirt.

A pair of girls came into my aisle, lost in conversation and took off their shirts. I couldn't help stealing some glances out of my periphery. Stop it Tony.  One girl was blonde and the other was brunette. Both attractive by high school standards.  They looked a little familiar. The brunette, more so.  They must be in my class.

One of the girls - the blonde - noticed me looking. "Jealous, geek?"

Shit, I’ve been caught.  "Sorry. I was just lost in thought" I tried to diffuse the situation.

The blonde rolled her eyes, sighed and continued talking to the brunette. Cheerleading stuff perhaps? That would lead me to believe they might be cheerleaders.

I decided to not dwell and quickly exchanged my jeans for shorts. I put my other clothes back into the bag and stuffed it into an empty locker and locked it. I walked out of the locker room without checking out any more of my classmates.

I arrived at Gym class. Fay was in my gym class too. Nice. The blonde and brunette cheerleaders arrived a minute after me. They were in my class as well. Awkward.

When the Gym teacher announced that we would be going outside today and playing softball I was excited.

"Sweet" I said to myself. I have some extra experience in this area. I was the fastest base-runner on my company team. It was a source of that confidence I gained in my adult life. After the games I met my wife while playing flip-cup at the sponsor bar. It was a great time.

I visibly smiled at the memory. It's time to inject a little more Tony into Christina's life here.

My smile faded slowly as my classmate's picked me last. Seriously people? Don't you know what I'm capable of? At least I was on Fay's team.

In addition to being picked last, I was also last at the batting order and my teammates stuck me out in center field. The one time a fly ball got to me, I yelled, 'I got it", but the dude playing left field ignored my statement and ran in front of me and caught the ball before I could get to it. Ass.

When I finally got up to bat, Gym class was almost over. My team had two outs. I've been in similar situations. Time to be a hero!

I swung and missed. How did I miss it? My hand-eye coordination must be off being in a different body. Different arm lengths? Heavier chest?

"Focus Tony." I told myself, doing a few practice swings to adjust my hand-eye-bat coordination. The next pitch, my bat made contact with the ball. The bat and ball was heavier than I was expecting. But it was a line drive into left field regardless. I took off sprinting and got to first base before the ball did. My team cheered. The pitcher looked visibly surprised and yelled at his fielders for letting me get on base.

The next batter hit the ball right towards the base path between 1st and 2nd. As I was running towards second base, that friendly blonde cheerleader scooped up the ball, ran at me and pushed me down to the ground before I could reach second base. 

As I hit the ground, my glasses went flying.

"Nerd" she taunted, as she was high-fiving a few of her teammates.

A flight or flight response shot my adrenaline shot up. My fists balled up. I was still on the ground. I wanted to do something. But I stayed there looking up at her, unable to get back up. My legs were trembling. The malicious smile she gave me as she towered over me. She turned around and walked away just as the class bell rang.  I slammed the ground with my fist.

As the rest of the class started heading back to the building, Fay helped me up and handed me my glasses. "Christina, are you OK? I'm sorry that happened. Ignore Amber. She can be a bitch sometimes."

"Thanks" I said to Fay, hoping I successfully hid my voice from cracking.

Memories of being bullied came flooding back to me. A tear fell from my eye as I quickly wiped it away so neither Fay, nor any of my classmates could see me crying. Who did this Amber girl think she was? This isn't what I had in mind for today. This was supposed to be my second chance. The realization that this punk teenage girl just embarrassed an almost 40 year old man made me angrier and more dejected.



Hi, I'm Emily and I'm writing Gender Transformation Fiction! This site is a place for my to keep all of my stories in one place. I'm also a software developer in the daytime, so this site will also be a proving ground of cool new features that pop into my head. Feel free to message me on Twitter or at my Discord Server! You can also find me on and

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