Interlude 5 - The Barnes’s Story

15 years ago, Heather stood in the bridal suite amongst her friends and family. Today was the biggest day of her life. It was the day she was getting married to Joshua Barnes. She and Joshua had met over a year ago at a wine tasting. They hit it off, and a few months later they were engaged. 

Heather and Joshua had opted for a destination wedding in Bermuda. They were set to get married in a picturesque resort surrounded by friends and family. Once the reception ended, the honeymoon would begin.

She looked around at the smiling faces of her bridesmaids, her father, mother and her sister. Everyone was excited and overjoyed for Heather’s big day. Except for one person. Her bridesmaid, Michelle.

Even though it was her day, Heather pulled Michelle aside. “Are you OK?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Michelle said, void of emotion.

“Liar,” Heather said, nudging her bridesmaid.

Heather’s smile was so infectious that Michelle couldn't help but smile back. Michelle looked at her best friend standing there in her white gown. It was gorgeous. Of course it was. She helped pick it out a few months ago. She was also there when Joshua proposed. “Are you sure you are doing the right thing?”

Heather’s smile disappeared. “Not this again, Shelly.”

“I’m serious.”

“I’ve known Joshua for a year now. I love him. He loves me.”

“I just think he’s not the right one for you. You were barely dating when he proposed. I think you’ll regret it years down the line.”

Before Heather was able to offer her rebuttal, there was a knock at the door.

“Ten minutes,” the wedding coordinator spoke.

Heather didn’t reply to Michelle and instead moved to the other bridesmaids. Ones that wouldn't question her decision to marry her fiancé.

Michelle was disappointed Heather didn’t hear her out, so she picked up her backpack and quietly snuck out of the bridal suite.

* * *

Michelle knew she had only one shot at this as she made her way to the lounge where the groomsmen were congregating. She walked into the lounge. The groomsmen, complete in well-fitting black tuxedos, were laughing and horsing around.

The best man and Joshua were in the corner. The best man was adjusting Joshua’s tie.

The other groomsmen saw Michelle. 

“Whoa, Bridesmaid alert!” one guy shouted.

“Michelle,” Joshua said. “Are we almost on?”

“Almost,” she replied. “I was kinda hoping to talk with you alone.”

Joshua had a concerned look on his face. “Sure,” he said as he led her to a vacant room next door.

Michelle took a shoe box out of her backpack. “Heather wanted you to wear something for good luck.”

“Oh really?” he said, curious what his fiancée would get him on the day of their wedding.

What Joshua didn’t know was that Michelle had stolen a certain device from work. A highly classified device that allowed a user to control remote combat machines safely from outside of a warzone. Michelle realized during testing that the electrical impulses also worked on humans. She kept that detail to herself as she could imagine this device being used to include political leaders. She’d be fired, or worse, if her bosses found out she stole the device and it took it out of the lab - or the country.

Michelle’s Plan A was to try to talk some sense into her best friend and convince Heather to voluntarily call off the wedding. She knew Joshua wouldn’t voluntarily call it off either. Since that didn’t work, it was on to Plan B. Plan B was to remotely control Joshua’s body, causing him to sabotage the wedding, hoping Heather would then call it off.

She pulled a silver necklace out of her bag. One end of the necklace had a sapphire stone in a setting. That was for looks. The other end near the clasp had the remote synaptic node. She had made sure to buy a cheap necklace and attach the very expensive, very experimental device to it.

“That's beautiful,” he said. “But she wants me to wear it?”

“It’s good luck to wear something of the brides' as you say your wedding vows,” she lied.

“I never heard of that tradition,” Joshua said skeptically.

She didn’t want him questioning that logic. “Here turn around, let me put it on you.”

Not wishing to waste any more time arguing, he turned around and she draped the necklace around him, fastening the clasp. 

She then tucked it under his shirt collar, making sure the synaptic node was up against the spine of his neck.

He turned around.

The wedding coordinator came into the lounge. “Gentlemen, it’s time.”

“Good luck,” she said, hugging him, pretending this man was good enough for her friend.

* * *

Michelle walked out of the lounge and back to the bridal suite. Before she went in, she opened the box and pulled out the controller - a tiny device with LEDs and buttons, no bigger than a deck of cards. It was a hastily-assembled prototype, and the only one of its kind in the world. Priceless wouldn’t begin to describe it. Node 1 was lit green to denote it had contact with Joshua’s spine and was detecting brain waves.

She chucked imagining that Josh the Jock had any brain waves whatsoever.

She fished another synaptic node necklace from the box. She clasped it around her own neck and Node 2 lit up on the controller.

She needed to test it out before the ceremony, so she pressed the “remote control” button on the controller. Suddenly she felt light-headed as her vision turned black.

Next thing Michelle knew, she was being caught by the arm by the best man.

“Yo, Josh, are you OK?” he asked.

Michelled looked around. It worked. She was in control of Joshua’s body. “I’m great,” she said to the best man.

“Keep walking,” the wedding coordinator said. Michelle continued walking and following the wedding coordinator outside of the ceremony hall. Both Heather’s and Joshua’s mothers were waiting there. One of the groomsmen came forward and met Heather’s mother and went to escort her.

The test was a success. Michelle reached up behind her neck and double tapped the synaptic receiver and in a rush, she found herself back in front of the bridal suite.

She walked back into the room.

“Where did you go?” Heather asked.

“I needed some air,” Michelle replied.

“I’m sorry about earlier,” Heather said. “I know you don’t particularly like Joshua. But I love him. And if you love me, you’ll respect my wishes.”

Michelle nodded and the two best friends hugged.

The truth is, Michelle thought they weren’t a good match. Heather was a little on the nerdy side, well read in the classics and always had a book she was reading. Joshua went to college for football, but wasn’t good enough to make pros and thus found himself as a gym teacher with only a “communications” degree to call back on.

Heather looked down at the necklace Michelle had on. “That’s a pretty necklace.”

Heather clutched the cheap pendent. “Thanks, it’s a family heirloom.”

The wedding coordinator entered the room and said it was time for everyone to get into position. 

The bride, bridesmaids, and the father-of-the-bride all walked down the same hallway Michelle had just walked as Joshua. They approached the same closed door she was at a few minutes ago.

Heather and her father hung back around the corner.

Michelle inconspicuously checked the controller. Both nodes were glowing. She hid the controller in her bouquet. She then felt an itch at the back of her neck that she scratched, unaware she knocked the cheap clasp open. The necklace dropped to the floor as Michelle continued on.

The doors opened for the bridesmaids and she was the second one to walk.

* * *

When the last bridesmaid had walked into the hall, the doors reclosed and Heather and her father moved up to the door.

Heather saw something sparkle on the floor. It was the necklace Michelle was just wearing. She knew it was a family heirloom and didn’t want Michelle to lose it.

She handed the bouquet to her father. “Dad, can you hold this a second?” She then reached down and grabbed the necklace. It had two things on it. A bright stone, and a flat silver disc.

She didn’t have time or pockets, so she put it around her neck and clasped it shut. “I’ll get this to her later. Something borrowed, right?”

She took her bouquet back from her father and took his arm.

* * *

The doors opened and the congregation stood for Heather as an orchestral version of “Can't Help Falling in Love” played.

Michelle was nervous. Which moment should she choose to sabotage this? Should she do it now, during the vows, or wait until the officiant asked for objections? She decided to wait until the vows so Heather would at least get this moment.

Twenty minutes went by, and Heather and Joshua recited their vows. Now was Michelle’s opportunity. She pressed the button.

And nothing happened.

The officiant spoke, “If anyone objects to the marriage, speak now or forever hold your peace.”

Michelle hit the controller with her palm and it fell out of her bouquet prompting the congregation to look at her with disdain.

She turned red from embarrassment, picked it up and stood straight back up. She looked down at the device and the LEDs were off. Something went wrong.

Heather and Joshua stared at each other for a confusing moment. It was as if they were looking at a mirror. They looked down at their hands which were still holding each other.

Heather craned her neck. The tie felt too tight.

Joshua inhaled, but the dress’s corset was constricting.

They made eye contact but only shared a look of confusion. Joshua squeezed his hand, and Heather squeezed back.

The officiant turned to Heather in Joshua’s body. “Do you, Joshua, take Heather to be your lawfully wedded wife? If so answer ‘I do.’”

Joshua answered “I do.”

The officiant glanced at Joshua in the bride's body and chuckled. “Joshua,” he repeated.

“I do,” Joshua repeated.

The officiant stopped laughing and decided to continue despite the bride’s nervousness. He fully turned to the bride. “Do you, Heather, take Joshua to be your lawfully wedded husband? If so answer ‘I do.’”

Heather answered “I do.”

At that point the congregation nervously laughed, thinking the bride and groom were either nervous or pulling a prank on their friends and family.

“They’re not even married yet and are finishing each other’s sentences,” the officiant joked. That got a laugh from the congregation.

Michelle was freaking out. She was missing her opportunity. She slowly pressed the remote control button again, and the LEDs remained off.

Heather and Joshua felt a rush of vertigo, but since they were holding each other’s hands, they were able to stabilize themselves. They looked at each other and realized whatever just happened went back to normal.

The officiant continued with the ceremony. “I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.”

Heather and Joshua smiled at each other and the newlyweds lovingly kissed as the congregation cheered.

Michelle was furious.

* * *

After Michelle was escorted down the aisle by a random groomsman, who tried flirting with her, she pulled the device out of the bouquet. 

Why wasn’t it working? She hit it a few times. The LEDs remained off. She couldn’t believe it. She just watched her best friend get married and wasn’t able to stop them. All of this work and all of this planning, to blow it at the finish line. She reached up for her necklace and found nothing.

“Where is it?” She wondered, starting to freak out.

* * *

Michelle went through the motions and watched Heather and Joshua get photos, get introduced at the reception, have their first dance, get their faces smashed with cake, then finally leave the wedding hall.

She was quiet most of the time, stewing in her disappointment and anger. She didn’t even get up for the bouquet toss.

When the guests left the reception hall, she returned to her room and cried. She had lost one of the nodes, and the love of her life just got married to someone else.

* * *

Heather and Joshua were basking in the first post-wedding coital bliss when Heather noticed the necklace around Joshua's neck.

“Honey what is this?”

“This is the necklace you gave me,” he said, puzzled.

“That I gave you?”

“Yeah,” he said. Then he noticed a similar one around Heather’s neck. “Hey, you have one, too.”

Heather grasped the necklace still around her neck. “This is Michelle’s. I was holding it for her, but forgot to give it back.”

“Michelle gave me this and said you wanted me to wear it.”

* * *

At that same moment, a crying and furious Michelle took the controller and hurled it against her hotel room wall. It shattered into pieces. As it hit the floor sparks sizzled and a small puff of smoke emanated from the wreckage.

* * *

Both Joshua and Michelle were once again met with vertigo.

Joshua sat up and looked at what appeared to be Heathers naked body. “It happened again.”

Heather then sat up. “I thought I was imagining that. During the ceremony.”

“No. That really happened. And it’s happening again.” He cupped the breasts on his chest. 

Heather smacked Joshua's hands away, but then noticed the still erect member on her own body. She touched it to confirm whether or not she was imagining this. Nope - that’s real.

“Do you think these necklaces have anything to do with it?” Joshua pondered.

Heather’s face turned red with anger. “Michelle!” She jumped out of bed and attempted to get dressed. She slid her panties on and realized they didn’t fit. She looked over to Joshua. “What do we do?”

“Let’s just wear each other’s clothes until we figure this out,” Joshua suggested.

Heather handed him her panties, then Joshua saw the wedding dress hanging in the corner. “Wait, I can’t wear that.”

The newlyweds dug around in their suitcases for normal clothes. Heather handed Joshua a crop top with leggings, and Joshua gave her a band T-shirt and cargo shorts.

Joshua sighed in relief. He had dodged a poofy white bullet. Heather, on the other hand, sighed in annoyance. She had worn the constricting and uplifting dress for hours without complaining. They marched out of the bridal suite and to where Heather knew Michelle was staying. Heather banged loudly on the door.

Michelle opened the door. Her makeup was smeared down her face from tears. “Joshua?” she said sniffling.

Heather barged into Michelle’s room, her new stature almost knocking Michelle over.

“What the fuck, Joshua?” she asked.

“I’m Heather,” she shouted.

“And I’m Joshua,” growled Heather’s body, following his new bride into the room.

Heather ripped the necklace off and held it up. “Did you do this, Shelly?” 

She looked at the couple. “How’d you get that?” she asked, pointing at the necklace on Heather’s body’s neck. 

“You dropped it,” Heather said. “I was going to give it back to you, but I put it on instead.” Then she ripped the one off of Joshua and shook them both at Michelle. “Start talking!”

“Shit!” Michelle exclaimed, walking over to where the controller lay in pieces. “You weren’t supposed to be the one to wear that.” She then pointed at Heather’s body. “Wait - are you Joshua?” she asked, still trying to wrap her head around the situation.

“Yeah,” Joshua responded.

“It’s not supposed to work like that. The brain waves are not supposed to travel backwards.”

“I want answers, Shelly!” Heather demanded, pointing Joshua’s finger in Michelle’s face.

Michelle sat down on the floor next to the pieces of the controller. “It was supposed to be me.”

“What was?”

“On the altar with you. I love you Heather. We were supposed to be together. Not him.”

Heather, in Joshua’s body, sat down next to Michelle. “You’re one of my best friends Michelle. But I love Joshua. He’s the one I want to spend my life with.”

“But you’re bi. What about that night we made love?”

Heather glanced up at Joshua, who was stunned at the revelation. “Shells, we were drunk. It was only one time.”

“You-you said you loved me,” Michelle wept.

“I do love you.” Heather replied. “But as a friend. I made you a bridesmaid. I can’t believe you’d do this to me. To us. On our wedding day.”

“I only wanted to remote control Joshua and sabotage the wedding. I didn’t expect you two to switch bodies.”

“Enough with the ‘whys’,” Joshua cut in. “Can you fix this?”

Michelle held up shards of circuit board. “Not here.”

* * *

The next morning, Heather and Joshua discussed their predicament. They would have to wait until they returned home to see about undoing what Michelle’s device did to them. Until then, they still had another week left of their honeymoon. The question on both of their minds was whether they should cancel their honeymoon and go home, or spend their honeymoon as each other.

It took a little getting used to. Josha felt naked wearing Heather’s clothing, especially her swimwear. Heather felt weird with a little extra baggage in her pants. Heather did Joshua’s makeup, and Joshua helped Heather shave her face.

Michelle flew home, but noticed that Heather and Joshua were more flirty than usual as they looked like they were having fun role-playing as each other. Michelle’s plan to wedge them apart had backfired.

One night after one too many drinks at the bar, the newlyweds stumbled back to their suite. Heather picked up a very tipsy Joshua and carried him over the threshold and deposited him on the bed. He looked up at his wife in his body and noticed something tenting up from his jeans. “Whoa, honey. You look a little excited…”

Heather looked down and blushed. She then climbed onto the bed and straddled her husband in her body.

“What are you doing?” Joshua asked. They hadn’t been intimate since they swapped.

“Michelle was right about one thing,” she teased.

“What’s that?”

“I am bi.” She leaned down and kissed Joshua. It didn't phase her that she was kissing herself. As a teenager she practiced kissing a mirror all of the time.

As for Joshua, his eyes got wide as he watched himself lean into the kiss. It was awkward at first, but he rationalized it as this was still his wife and his body. He let himself go and kissed his wife back.

Before long, Heather started removing Joshua’s clothing and starting suckling his breasts.

At first it tickled him, but then it started to feel good. “Heather, I’m not sure if we - oh my God, don’t stop.”

To Joshua’s surprise, Heather moved away from his bosom and started kissing his tummy and working her way down his body.

She removed his panties.

He was speechless. And getting damp down there. But more than anything he was curious. When else would he get this opportunity to see what sex is like as a woman?

The moment Heather went down on him, he was in ecstasy. “Oh my God!” he moaned and eventually screamed.

Three orgasms later, Heather removed her clothes and laid down beside him, ready for him to return the favor.

Joshua looked his lover in the eye, and then at her erection. He thought of what she had just done for him, and in his post-orgasmic haze he didn’t even hesitate climbing in between her legs and pleasing her orally. 

Before long Heather and Joshua swapped positions as she climbed on top of him. He timidly spread his legs to let her in.

An hour later, after both newlyweds were sexually satisfied, Heather turned to Joshua. “What if we can’t swap back?”

Joshua didn’t have an answer, but if it was anything like tonight, he could deal with it.

* * *

A week later, when their honeymoon was over, and they were back in the states, they were anxiously awaiting a call from Michelle.

The call finally came, but it wasn’t what they hoped to hear.

“The device was beyond repair,” she cried. “I’m so sorry.”

“Can you make a new one?” Heather asked.

“I was fired,” Michelle stated.

* * *

With no options, Heather and Joshua attempted to act like each other and go to their respective jobs. Joshua tried to do Heather's job as a librarian at the local community college. Heather tried to do his as a high school gym teacher and football coach.

Unfortunately, they were both too far out of their element to succeed. At one point they tried to tell the truth, but nobody believed them, and they were both fired days apart.

That night, as the newlyweds were discussing their next move, there was a knock at the door. 

On the porch stood a young woman claiming to be the deputy headmaster of an exclusive private school. “Hello, I’m Judy Hathaway,” she introduced herself. “Are you Heather and Jacob Barnes?”

“We are,” Joshua cautiously replied.

She handed them both brochures for a boarding school. “I am aware of your… unique situation. My school is just as unique. Therefore, I would like to discuss the opportunity of having you both join our school staff.”